“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
I’m not sure where this particular blog post will lead, but maybe that doesn’t really matter.
Life really is all about letting go. And chocolate. Everything really ends up being about chocolate.
I’ve been thinking about my relationship with food lately (well I’ve thought about it most of my life actually), and I’ve been hearing a lot about cleanses, and this has intrigued me, not necessarily for the health value; rather, going on a cleanse means letting go–letting go of my own conceptual thoughts on how and when and what types of foods I should/could/would benefit from eating and drinking.
On Monday, on a whim–the best things in life happen on whims, I went into Cafe Gratitude and asked them how long it would take to prepare a one day cleanse. They said about ten minutes, so I said “okay. I’ll go for it.”
I didn’t know exactly what I was in for, but I had to do it. I had to change how I thought about food. I had to give up control. I had to admit that maybe I didn’t know what was best, or at the very least I had to explore new avenues, new options.
The cleanse consisted of 5 drinks and one salad. The first two drinks tasted rather putrid. But I soon learn that taste really didn’t matter, for I could feel change manifesting inside of me. As the day progressed I felt, for the most part, a certain happiness, a heightened level of energy. Part of that could be attributed to the high that comes with trying something new and healthy, but there was so much more to this feeling that I can’t even begin to explain, not even now.
I started to have the feeling that if I could do this for one day and thrive that maybe there was way more out there than I ever imagined.
So where does the chocolate come in? Sometime around 8p.m. I found myself in a near panic because I couldn’t find my rosters for school the next day. So I started going through stuff in a near panic, and that’s when I found it: this past April I bought my dear dear friend Niki a See’s chocolate bar for her birthday. She LOVES See’s and they don’t/didn’t have one in Ohio, and I wanted her to have a treat, but soon after I brought it home I couldn’t find it. I’d looked forever for it, eventually figuring I’d lost it.
But, just after 8p.m. on the day of my one day cleanse, I found it. And I couldn’t stop laughing (in a good way). On the very day I was taking a new step into rethinking my thoughts about how and what I eat, I find a chocolate bar.
The Nancy of old would have decided that she would wait until midnight and then eat the chocolate bar at the end of her one-day experiment, but this new Nancy has take the chocolate bar and put in an envelope, and as I sit her writing this the chocolate is on its way to Ohio.
I feel compelled to share this story with you because, while it was only one day, winds of change are continuing to shift for me at a lightning pace. I don’t know how to think about food anymore. I just know that after Monday, everything tastes differently, even life…………………